


Raison D'être

by Deanlovescaspassiton



Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, Fluff, M/M, Not too much violence, Short Chapters, Yandere!Eric, im sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-30
Updated: 2015-12-30
Packaged: 2018-05-10 10:15:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 2,813
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5581861
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Deanlovescaspassiton/pseuds/Deanlovescaspassiton
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Yandere!Eric<br/>what it says on the tin<br/>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~<br/>“Did you kill our friends!? our colleagues? Grell, Ronnie, Will. Did you?” <br/>" I did.” he admitted. Curt and to the point.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Un Beta'd as this is a present for my beta- Yandere!Eric, which took research and i'm still sure i've not written a yandere right but whatever, this is as good as it's going to get. This was intended to be a christmas present but you can all see how well that turned out. Sorry i've not posted much, School saps all my time and i don't write often as it is. 
> 
> For [IzaChanLuv](http://archiveofourown.org/users/IzaChanLuv/profile) my hardworking Beta. thankyou!
> 
> And for those who don't do french - the title means 'Reason for living'

Grell kept touching him. That was it. That was the final straw. Constantly touching Alan, the contact ranging from a good ol’ shoulder pat to full on arms wrapped around him and swirling him around the room. It stopped now. 

“Eric!” Grell cried from where she was stood waiting. “i got your message! why did you want to see me? gotta be quick- i promised Alan i’d help with some paperwork” she groaned. Eric narrowed his eyes and looked over the empty streets with minute interest. “Eric?” Grell asked again, waving her hand in front of his face casually. Eric gave her a harsh glance as he swiftly grabbed Grell’s wrist and slammed her down onto the floor. Growling out “Alan is mine do you fucking understand?” as he did so. Grell snarled back and used her legs to flip Eric onto his back, the harsh impacts of the fight making low thudding sounds and pained grunts. “The fuck are you on about!?” Grell shouted, forcing Eric’s head back down forcefully to the concrete.   
Eric inhaled deeply through the pain before pushing up and grabbing Grell’s hair, pulling her up by it as he moved to stand behind her. “Eric stop! I'm not interested in Alan!” Eric wrapped her long hair around his fist and yanked her back so her throat was exposed. “Im sorry but i can’t take your word for it” he replied as his death scythe materialised in his other hand. Grell caught it in her peripheral vision and started to struggle wildly. “Eric stop! please!” she screamed, her throat burning, her eyes starting to tear up. “goodbye Grell” Eric muttered before bringing his weapon to rest at her bared throat and pulling it across rapidly without faltering in the action. Grell’s eyes dulled as red blood seeped from her neck wound, hardly noticeable from her red attire. Dropping the body with little care Eric wiped his saw on the back of her coat and sheathed it. Eyes glinting dangerously Eric stood and stalked away with a dark look about him.


	2. Chapter 2

“hey hey it’s okay” Alan soothed, rubbing comforting circles into Ronnie’s shoulder. Eric watched from his desk with a slight scowl. Ronnie kept sniffing and sobbing as he tried to speak. “it’s just…Grell senpai..i…she was my friend..she’s gone” he cried, shudders wracking his body. Alan sighed and pulled the boy into a hug. “i know..i know…we all miss her so much” Ronnie cried harder and gripped Alan tight, sobbing into his shoulder. Eric snapped his pen. How dare Ronnie just grab Alan like that? he would have to go. Grell payed the price for trying to take Alan away from him, now Ronnie was doing the same. Eric wouldn’t stand for it. Eric sighed and grabbed another pen. “can you stay with me? it’s just..she was so good at what she did and now i don't feel safe anymore” Ronnie whispered. Alan inhaled sharply. “of course. you’ve got nothing to worry about Ron. Breathe”. Eric leaned back and started contemplating how many of his colleagues -anyone- he would have to kill for his message to be clear. 

“Hey Ron” Eric greeted, the boy looked positively wrecked. “M..may i..stay with you for…” Eric took pity. “of course”. Ronnie sat down, more fell down than sat, really, into a seat next to Eric. “hey, wanna go out tonight, drink to Grell?” Ronnie looked up with wide eyes. “umm…yeah, i think she would have liked that” Eric nodded readily. good. this was going to be easy. Ronnie was no grell on a good day,let alone like he was now. Easy prey. 

“hey Eric” Ronnie greeted numbly. Eric nodded slowly. “Ron” he mumbled back just as sombrely. Ronnie scuffed his feet against the edge of the pavement. “so we should uh, go get some drinks in us” Eric wordlessly agreed and brandished his deathsycthe just as Ronnie turned around. “Im sorry Ron” he muttered. Ronnie’s shoulders sagged but otherwise he didn’t notice-presuming the older reaper was making small talk. Eric sighed and stepped forward quickly, plunging his saw into Ronnie’s back. the younger reaper coughed and gurgled as he reached around blindly for the source of his pain. “Looking out for Alan is more important than you and Grell. I’m sorry” Eric announced before ripping the saw out of Ronnie and swinging once again at his head with the handle. Bashing it in thrice for good measure. Alan was his.


	3. Chapter 3

“A full investigation will underway effective immediately, of course you are offered a intern to look out for you, and vice versa.” Eric near rolled his eyes. “no no sir, that won't be necessary, i can take care of myself- i don’t need protection, with all due respect of course.” will even looked slightly relived. “well that’s settled then. On with your work Slingby” Eric nodded dutifully and proceeded to stand, hands in pockets as he left the room. Finally no one was standing between him and Alan.

“alan” Eric greeted most shyly. “Eric” Alan replied with a beaming smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. Eric noticed. “whats wrong?” he asked, all playfulness gone from him. Alan sighed and his expression turned so sad it made Eric’s blood boil. “i miss Grell and Ronnie, I'm worried, scared. And to top it off Will is making us stay even longer to complete all the damned paperwork and i was really looking forward to spending some time with you as it feels like i’ve hardly seen you recently and now we can’t because of Will.” Eric extended a hand to urge Alan to slow down but the reaper kept going, like a tiny , pissed off lil freight train. “ I understand it has to get done but he acts like Grell and Ron haven't even effected him, and now he’s taking it out on me, on us!” Alan ranted, his breaths coming hard and fast. Eric just stared, bewildered by how beautiful Alan looked when he was mad. Eric rested a hand on Alan’s closest hand which he had unwillingly clenched into a fist. “it will clear up, Will is a hardass, that’s not new, i could speak to him-he’d understand.” Alan rubbed his face in fatigue with his free hand. “no, it wouldn’t solve anything. Go home Eric, I'm sorry. I’ll see you tomorrow, be safe”. With that Alan rose and picked up a nearby stack of paperwork, his bad mood following him like a cloud of misery. Eric could only watch dumbly as he left, the same old urge rising up again.

4 times in the past week, that’s how many times Will had gotten in between Eric and Alan so much as speaking to one another. it was simple really. Will had to go as well, however unlike Grell and Ronnie Eric would have not even the slightest wince of regret or qualm about removing Will from the equation. “Slingby, stop staring at the wall and get back to work. Humphries, if your report isn’t finished by this afternoon you’ll wish you never moved to this branch.” Alan looked shell shocked as he started writing faster. Eric ground his teeth and got back to his paperwork, however his focus was on how soon he could kill his boss.

Will’s execution would’t be as easy as Ronnie’s yet he could not offer a challenge like grell had. Eric wanted to do this face to face, to let Will know who was responsible. To make him pay.   
Everyone had gone home, even Alan. Eric had hung back out of sight, just waiting for the chance to strike. Will was along, doing paperwork, the single bulb in his office offering limited light. Eric grabbed his weapon and stalked forward, weaving in-between the desks and inhaling deeply. Will stirred as the office door swung violently open, Eric stepping through looking particularly cold. Will lifted his own weapon and raised a questioning eyebrow. “So it was you, i have to say Slingby, even I dismissed you as a suspect. and now i assume you wish to add me to your trail of bodies. who next? Alan? have we really been such a disappointment to you?” Eric bristled. “i would never hurt Alan, ever! i would kill myself before harming him. I'm doing this for him. to keep him safe- you have all tried to take him away or keep him from me. It stops now. i don’t care how many i have to kill to keep him with me, i don’t care who.”

Will just sighed and stood up. “i can’t let you continue with your delusions, it’s not what Alan wants Eric. What would he say if he knew?” Eric lunged forward and swung fast. Will sidestepped and brought his scythe up to block the incoming attack. “don’t make me do this” Will warned. Eric just smirked. Eric’s right foot found it’s way around the back of Will’s left leg, with a quick hard tug Eric had Will tripping onto his back. the two scythes met again, the clanging sound ringing out, hollow. Eric quickly kicked Will’s side and during the distraction to stab deep into the man below. Will let out a strangled cry as Eric ripped the blade out. “Say hi to Ron and Grell for me”. Eric dropped his saw and grabbed Will’s weapon, the grip slack and weak. Acting fast Eric impaled will through the chest with his own weapon, the carpet around him rapidly being stained by the blood. Eric exhaled and chucked the foreign scythe down. Picking up his own he swiftly left the office, the department and finally, the building.


	4. Chapter 4

Alan’s tears kept coming, broken and scared Alan had moved in with Eric for safety precautions. the two had ended up essentially cuddled up together in the corner of Eric’s sofa as Alan kept weeping. His angry shouting from earlier in the night had turned into fearful and sorrowful bouts of tears streaming from his blood shot eyes. his hair was a mess too as Eric carded his hand through it almost gleefully. almost. Eric rested his chin on Alan’s head and tried to soothe his ramblings. “shh Alan, you’re safe i won’t let anything happen to you. I miss them all too but you can be sure they’re in a better place.i know they are” Eric said calmly, the ending a tad too confident. Alan turned into Eric even more as he rested his face against Eric’s chest. “thank you. for everything. I, i miss them yes but promise me something.” Eric closed his eyes. “anything” he whispered. Alan shivered. “that you won’t die, that you won’t leave me- i don’t think i could handle it if you left me.” Eric’s eyes snapped open and he carefully lifted Alan’s head up so their eyes met. His hands gently cradled Alan’s face. “i swear on my life and my soul, I'm not going anywhere, I'm staying with you. Nothing-no one- is going keep us apart”. Silence. Alan’s lips parted at the omission and Eric tried to find That alan believed him in his open expression. the two just stared, caught in their own world. the silence broke as Alan mumbled an ‘i love you’ before leaning up and pressing forward, his lips on Eric’s. This was all he would ever need. Alan, his, with him. I Love You. three little words. Eric grinned into the kiss. He pulled back ever so slightly to stroke Alan’s cheek as he replied. “i love you more.”


	5. Chapter 5

Eric hadn’t noticed the strange stares from Alan all morning. At work he was quieter than usual. Eric couldn’t be happier with their new situation, their change in relationship. He was outwardly chipper whereas Alan was outwardly stoic. unusual turn of events. “Have they determined who’s been killing off reapers yet?” one of the newest interns asked as they came in with their new supervisor. “not yet, but it was done by one of us- we’ll find em. Spears wasn’t a suicide- no matter how it looked” Eric just glanced up before shaking his head so minutely if Alan hadn’t have been watching closely he would have missed it. The intern stopped at the two occupied desks. “where were you guys when it happened?” the inter asked, half curiously half accusingly. Alan frowned, “at work waiting for grell to help me, again at work and then at home. yourself?” the intern gave some speech about how they couldn’t have possibly done it as they were: A-not trained enough to take on any of the fallen shinigami and B- they were with their partner at each time of death. “what about you sir?” the intern asked, turning to Eric. shit. Eric blinked. “home, all times”. Alan frowned again. “haven’ t you got work to be doing?” he enquired. The intern’s eyes widened as they rushed off. Eric chuckled but Alan stopped writing. “i thought you were with Ronnie the night he died.” alan stated. Eric froze, pen bleeding ink into the paperwork. “i was, he died after we had our drinks” Eric lied. “is that so” Alan mumbled. Eric met his eyes and found something he’d never seen in Alan’s before. Alan shrugged and went back to his work. “guess we’ll never know”. Eric frowned but didn’t reply. a heaviness had fallen upon them like an oppressive shroud. 

hours later the two had reached their destination-home. Eric was elated they were together, both in terms of relationship of and living arrangements. Eric sighed as he stretched out the kinks from sitting at his desk whilst Alan closed the door slowly. “Eric…i wanted to ask you something” Eric turned around with a confused expression. “sure thing” he said, eyes glued to Alan who had his back almost to the door. Almost as if he were scared. of what? Eric!? Alan took a deep breath and raised his eyes to Eric’s. “D..Di..Did you..Kill” Alan choked as he struggled to ask. Eric stepped forward and Alan raised a hand. “No. stay where you are” he bit out. Eric gaped. “alan”he uttered softly. “Did you kill our friends!? our colleagues? Grell, Ronnie, Will. Did you?” he demanded, his eyes wet with tears that threaten to fall. Eric dropped his surprised expression. How did Alan know? he was so clever, but no matter. it’s good he knows -they’re going to be fine and Eric had once promised never to lie to Alan so… “yes. i did.” he admitted. curt and to the point…and that made Alan lose it. 

Alan’s eyes widened, his tears fell and a choked sob sprung from him as he shakily stepped back, leaning into the door for support- he looked so betrayed. Eric swallowed, he wanted to make Alan happy but he didn’t know how to do it. “Alan” he started, lost as he watched Alan curl inward as he fell to his feet. “no!” he sobbed. shaking and quivering as he spoke again. “was all of it a lie? a sick game? did they even see you kill them!? did they fight back!?” Eric looked down and spoke softly. Ron didn’t, they all died quickly. i promise.” Alan laughed. “your promises mean nothing! am i next? huh? was what you said just words Eric!?” Eric fell to his knees. “Alan no…never…I do love you, thats why i killed them all! so they wouldn’t keep you from me or take you away. I would never hurt you, i’d die before i’d do that.” Alan couldn’t speak , he just silently sobbed as Eric crawled to him and dragged him into his lap, clinging to him, so close there was no space between them. “Darling please don’t cry.” Alan buried his face in Eric’s shoulder, eyes screwed shut in the hope it was just a bad dream. “Eric why” he cried. “no one was keeping us apart, it's you- it always been you, that was never gong to change. certainly not with the guys.” he argued dejectedly as he pulled back to rest his forehead against Eric’s. “you and i can be together now, no one to separate us” Eric appeased, his arms bracketing Alan’s back to keep him close and upright in his lap. the two once again stared at one another. “i love you” Eric said quietly, almost reverently. his eyes shining with tears of his own. Alan swallowed as he shut his eyes. “And i love you” he whispered back shakily, his tone suggesting he was ashamed of his words. “you said you would die before ever hurting me” alan stated, the query in the tone. “yes” Eric agreed. Alan looked and sounded Wrecked, his voice breaking with grief as he opened his eyes and said “Eric, you’re hurting me now.” A tear slid down Eric’s cheek.

**Author's Note:**

> So.....I apologise.  
> Happy New Year Guys


End file.
